Caracas Chronicles

For Monday, July 25, 2016. Translated by Javier Liendo.

Delcy Rodríguez was the speaker for the 233th anniversary of the birth of Libertador Simón Bolívar and the 193th anniversary of the Naval Battle of Maracaibo Lake. The airplane ticket to Zulia must be exceedingly expensive, because beside the co-president Padrino López and governor Arias Cárdenas, there was nobody else from the Executive Branch. Nicolás didn’t go, nor his accessory, Vice-president Aristóbulo Istúriz, nor Diosdado -our new expert in judicial matters-. Not even another minister or a CNE’s rectora, the Prosecutor General, the Attorney General or any of the TSJ’s questionable justices. Bolívar isn’t worth the same anymore, neither the historical figure nor the banknote. To prove the point that villains are only useful in their roles, Delcy’s speech was even more boring than a seashell aquarium.

Everything against the dialogue

However, the Foreign Affairs minister dedicated this Saturday to criticizing the Democratic Unity Roundtable’s statements about their possible participation in the imaginary dialogue. Twitter is her comfort zone -sadly, this doesn’t mean she knows how use it-, that’s why she elaborated on eight points challenging the opposition’s statement, which she claims on her summary tweet to be full of “lies, half truths and manipulations.” I had to edit some tweets for my own peace of mind, but other mistakes couldn’t be avoided.

1. The OAS hasn’t participated and will never participate in any dialogue process in sovereign Venezuela. Translation: don’t even think about Almagro.
2. The Vatican has been invited by Nicolás to the dialogue with the opposition since 2014 to yugular (sic) the extreme violence. Translation: Nicolás is the first one to believe.
3. We condemn the opposition’s impresentable and disrespectful veto against the Dominican Republic. Translation: We already lost the OAS and UNASUR, at least give us the CELAC.
4. The Executive Branch doesn’t meddle in matters pertaining solely to the Judicial Branch. Justice will guarantee the Human Rights of the victims of opposition violence. Translation: There’s no respect for the Human Rights of anyone whom the PSUV doesn’t consider a victim.
5. The opposition promised to backtrack on the National Assembly’s agreement that consummates the coup d’Etat against the TSJ, as well as respecting its decisions. Translation: The TSJ can violate the Constitution at leisure and not accepting that is considered a coup d’Etat.
6. If the opposition wants to discuss the recall referendum, we’ll present countless evidence of the mega fraud committed by the MUD. Translation: Remember what I said two tweets ago? Well, we do meddle in the Electoral Branch’s matters.
7. Nicolás presented the issues for dialogue to the Venezuelan people: respect for the Constitution, the Truth Committee and the economic war. Translation: You don’t demand anything, we do.
8. We demand the MUD to respect the Rule of Law in Venezuela and call them to a constructive dialogue for peace, without any delay or condition: Translation: Hahahaha!

Cynic

“The CNE can neither hasten nor delay the recall. We must stick to the schedule, to a regulation we made in 2007,” said CNE’s chief rectora, Tibisay Lucena, this Sunday. She clarified that if they haven’t moved on, it’s because the requirements haven’t been fulfilled yet. But if they are, the CNE will take all the necessary measures to activate the recall referendum. She’s waiting for the first phase to conclude next July 26th, with a report signed by her and addressed to herself. She emphasized that only when the 1% phase is complete -and the MUD is ratified-, will they be able to present the request for the recall referendum. She nearly winked and said: that’s the next delay, guys.

Saying that she and her partners have turned the CNE into a true Public Branch -if I were Jorge Rodríguez, me arrecho-, it was moving to hear her talk about the electoral rights of the voters who want Nicolás to finish his term. About the statements of every single PSUV spokesperson dismissing the possibility of a recall referendum this year, she only said that those are political opinions absolutely valid in a democracy. Isn’t she cute?

Meanwhile, the opposition announced a march to CNE headquarters to request the activation of the referendum’s next phase. They promised it for next Wednesday, July 27th, with two already failing rallying points: Libertador Avenue and Bello Monte. I don’t know if they saw Tibisay, but I’ve had more than my share of tear gas in the previous attempts. Let’s see what happens on Tuesday.

Silence

Do you hear it? Sssshhhh! It’s chavismo’s silence regarding the case of Cilia Flores’ narco-nephews, a faithful summary of the contradictions of the leftist discourse advanced by the corrupt and the cynical. Everything that’s been released about Efraín Campos Flores and Franqui Francisco Flores de Freitas would’ve been enough for any fairly serious politician to distance himself from these relatives and their poor choices, to take the chance to spread false messages about the value of work, the fragility of crime, the reach of justice and whatever nonsense creativity could allow. A fairly serious politician -if he wants to ignore all the drug transactions with the FARC, “El Mexicano” and “El Gocho”- would ratify the safety measures in Maiquetía International Airport, PDVSA’s bids, Sebenpe’s private jet and the improbability for even the most talented corrupt official in this country to earn ten million dollars thanks to oil revenues. But Nicolás is as serious as he is a statesman.
The PSUV’s waiting to attack the opposition with the CNE’s report and all the lawsuits prepared and promised by Hermann Escarrá; they’re also waiting for Amazonas’s challenged deputies to rejoin the National Assembly. When these attacks come, remember Efraín and Franqui, these Flores with generous words, admitting themselves pompous, long-time corrupts, criminals with the profound protection of impunity of an aunt who’s neither first lady nor first fighter, a complacent aunt, who keeps silent just like her husband. Ssshhhh!