Caracas Chronicles

Quico says: Juan Manuel Santos, Marta Colomina, Leopoldo Castillo, Heinz Sontagg, Miguel Henrique Otero, Nelson Mezerhane, Marcel Granier, Alberto Federico Ravell, even Cesar Miguel Rondón (!!)…have you noticed how pretty much everyone Chávez accuses of plotting to kill him is a household name in Venezuela? (Well, ok: as long as the household in question is top heavy with politics junkies…)

Does this really raise no eyebrows within chavismo? I mean, ¡que casualidad! – only famous people want to bump the guy.

Lets be clear: I have no way of knowing if someone is plotting to assassinate the president, though I can understand why Chávez is worried. Be that as it may, the government’s story – that Mario Silva has proof of an active conspiratorial cabal made up entirely of celebrities – is beyond ridiculous…it’s insulting.

In that spirit, here’s a simple thesis to try on for size:

If Chávez is assassinated, he’ll be assassinated by someone you’ve never ever heard of before.

If you think about it, that’s obvious…it’s never going to be the high-profile, obsessively-spied-upon TV-talking-head demographic that’s going to be in a position to pull off something like this. If it goes down, it’ll be a Maiónica-type who’ll set it up: some low key, well-connected, under-the-radar operator with the modicum of common sense it takes to realize that lunging for every microphone within a ten-mile radius, fronting every organization you get involved in and media-whorery in general are not exactly conducive to successful plotting.

After all, how many morning talk shows and Ateneo de Caracas events did you see Hugo Chávez speaking at in the months ahead of February 4th, 1992?